In Honor of May Day

I present a fine HPL joke:

HP Lovecraft and August Derleth are sitting at an al fresco cafe on the abominable plateau of Leng. Sipping absinthe, as you do. It’d be a nice place if it wasn’t for the maddening cyclopean architecture with the obviously alien non-Euclidean geometry, but it’s the only spot for unthinkably vast distances and it’s got a lovely view, so you make do.

As they sit there, the ground before becomes disturbed by the passing of a great Dhole, burrowing beneath the earth, space rippling around it as it goes.

They sip their absinthe as the Dhole is followed by a Mi-Go, flapping and screeching - the noise driving several nearby patrons mad.

A shoggoth comes after, shambling along. It takes some time to pass, so they order another round of absinthe.

Then a long train of the spawn of Shub-Niggurath, the Black Goat of the Woods, ooze, crawl and tilt their way past - the locomotive systems reminiscent of slime running down a rock… but sideways… unthinkably sideways.

Then for a moment, there’s quiet and the plateau is empty… and Derleth turns to Lovecraft and says…

“Good Lord, Howard. Today it’s just one damned thing after another.”

A theory on the spreading of the virus known as “religion”.

This little piece came from the FSM group on Myspace (Thanks To:  The Nietzschean).

“Start with a cage containing five monkeys. Inside the cage, hang a banana on a string and place a set of stairs under it. Before long, a monkey will go to the stairs and start to climb towards the banana. As soon as he touches the stairs, spray all of the other monkeys with cold water.

After a while, another monkey makes an attempt with the same result all the other monkeys are sprayed with cold water. Pretty soon, when another monkey tries to climb the stairs, the other monkeys will succeed or fail to prevent it.

Now, put away the cold water. Remove one monkey from the cage and replace it with a new one. The new monkey sees the banana and wants to climb the stairs. To his surprise and horror, all of the other monkeys attack him. After another attempt and attack, he knows that if he tries to climb the stairs, he will be assaulted.

Next, remove another of the original five monkeys and replace it with a new one. The newcomer goes to the stairs and is attacked. The previous newcomer takes part in the punishment with enthusiasm! Likewise, replace a third original monkey with a new one, then a fourth, then the fifth. Every time the newest monkey takes to the stairs, he is attacked.

Most of the monkeys that are beating him have no idea why they were not permitted to climb the stairs or why they are participating in the beating of the newest monkey.

After replacing all the original monkeys, none of the remaining monkeys have ever been sprayed with cold water. Nevertheless, no monkey ever again approaches the stairs to succeed or fail for the banana.
and that my friends is why we have Religion.”

(I would link it, but the above was transmitted to me sans source link)

Alright Creationists - you want proof? Check it-

Enough of the fuxin’ lights for a while.

“In 1971, scientists started an experiment. They took 5 male lizards and 5 female lizards of the species Podarcis sicula2, and they placed them on an even tinier island, Pod Mrcaru, 0.03km2, which was also inhabited by another lizard species, from a tiny Adriatic island called Pod Kopiste, 0.09kmPodarcis melisellensis. Then a war broke out, the Croatian War of Independence, which went on and on and meant the little islands were completely neglected for 36 years, and nature took its course. When scientists finally returned to the island and looked around, they discovered that something very interesting had happened.”

Link to NatGeo for this AMAZING story!

A’right - more on these damn lights

What on Earth were those lights over Phoenix?

Jet? Flares? Balloons? UFO? Sighting remains a mystery

by John Faherty - Apr. 23, 2008 12:00 AM
The Arizona Republic

There were absolutely four lights. They appeared to hover in the sky.

They looked red or white, and they flickered. They were visible for nearly 15 minutes on Monday night.

The lights were seen by, among others, a Phoenix police-helicopter pilot, air-traffic controllers and a reporter. There was even an extended videotape.

But the lights were a mystery. A mystery that generated a lot of interest.

By Tuesday afternoon, there were 125,000 page views of the story on azcentral.com, 600,000 page views on the photographs and 40,000 viewings of the video.

The story was on the Drudge Report, FoxNews.com, ABC News and newspaper Web sites across the country.

Almost immediately, there were theories about what the lights might be.

Perhaps they were high-altitude flares that were visible from a great distance in the clear Arizona sky.

Or maybe they were airplanes or helicopters or weather balloons.

One Phoenix man said he saw his neighbor launching small flares attached to helium balloons.

The mystery couldn’t be answered by civilian or military authorities.

And perhaps, although this would have to be considered fairly unlikely, they were spaceships piloted by aliens.

The North American Aerospace Defense Command, which monitors the skies for security threats, said the organization did not know where the lights came from.

Luke Air Force Base officials said that they didn’t have any aircraft in the sky Monday night and that the lights were not part of any Air Force activities.

No agency thought it necessary to investigate the matter.

It’s the mystery of it all that makes people a little bit anxious.

“We are in the Age of Technology; we assume we can know anything we want to know,” said Chong Ho Yu, director of Arizona State University’s Applied Learning Technology Institute and who has a doctorate in psychology.

For some, aliens are a preferred scenario to not knowing.

“People become more anxious when they cannot know something,” Yu said. “It makes us feel less and less secure.”

Angela Cotera, an astronomer from Avondale, did not see the lights, but she does work with the SETI Institute.

SETI stands for Search for Extra Terrestrial Intelligence and is a respected scientific community with a goal to “explore, understand and explain the origin, nature and prevalence of life in the universe.”

With a research grant from NASA, Cotera researches how planets form around stars and whether they can sustain life.

She will not be preparing a welcoming party for our “visitors.”

Cotera, who has a doctorate from Stanford University, says these sighting are almost always flares.

“They move counter to what we expect they should, especially when you see them from a great distance like we can here in Arizona,” Cotera said. “They are not really hovering, it’s simply perspective.”

On Tuesday, many people were talking about a similar incident in March 1997, when a string of lights was visible over the city.

Just like that incident more than 10 years ago, people were intent on findings answers.

And some people think it is interesting to watch people look for answers.

“I have absolutely no doubt that these lights are an Earthly phenomenon. Perhaps something occurring in nature or man-made,” said Dan Cook of Phoenix, a retired preacher and aerospace engineer.

“The fact that man, in his infinite wisdom, cannot explain causes them to turn to the easiest answer. Aliens!”

Republic reporters Toby Phillips and Claudia Koerner contributed to this article.

SOURCE

Phoenix Lights II???

Phoenix Lights 2nd sighting

Strange lights appear again over Valley sky

by Erin Kozak - Apr. 21, 2008 10:13 PM
The Arizona Republic

Several Valley residents reported seeing strange red lights in the sky on Monday night and the cause of the lights remains a mystery.

Arizona Republic reporter Anne Ryman, who lives in Deer Valley, reported seeing four lights in a square shape that eventually became a triangular shape. The lights were moving to the east and they disappeared one by one. She said the lights were visible for about 13 minutes at about 8 p.m..

One north Phoenix resident, who wished to remain anonymous, said he saw four or five red lights lined up in a straight line and spaced apart evenly. The lights slowly moved east and became dimmer as the witness watched. He said the last light remained in the sky the longest. Then three jets came from the west and traveled in the direction of the red lights.

An official from Luke Air Force Base stated that they did not have any aircraft in the sky Monday night and that the lights were not part of any Air Force activities.

The Deer Valley airport officials said that the lights were not from any aircraft at that airport.

Ian Gregor, a spokesman for the Federal Aviation Administration said that air traffic controllers at Sky Harbor Airport also witnessed the lights, but they do not know the cause.

The incident is similar to the “Phoenix Lights” seen on March 13, 1997. Thousands of residents reported seeing a mile-wide, v-shaped formation of lights over the Valley. In that case the lights appeared about 7:30 p.m. and lasted until 10:30 p.m.

Source

UPDATE: Here is a link to the VIDEO

UPDATE #2 - a second reporter, Claudia Koerner, has updated the original story with the following:

Civilian and military aviation organizations said Tuesday the source of the strange red lights spotted over Phoenix Monday night remained unknown. An official with the North American Aerospace Defense Command, which monitors the skies for security threats, said Tuesday the organization did not know where the lights came from.

Ian Gregor, a spokesman for the Federal Aviation Administration said that though air traffic controllers at Sky Harbor Airport witnessed the lights, they do not know the cause. Nothing appeared on radar and Gregor said the FAA will not be investigating.

“There’s nothing to look into,” Gregor said.

UPDATE #3

Now, a new reporter. Zach Fowle, enters the fray and explains simply:

Phoenix man: Neighbor caused mysterious lights

There could be a less-than-supernatural explanation behind the strange lights that appeared over Phoenix on Monday night, according to one Phoenix man.

Lino Mailo, 44, said he saw his neighbor launch several helium balloons with flares attached to them from the back porch of his north Phoenix home. Mailo said the balloons took off about 8 p.m., right before the mysterious lights were spotted.

“It’s pretty tricky, because the higher the balloons get, the harder it is to tell what they are,” Mailo said.

A helicopter pilot with the Phoenix police department who was flying last night also saw the objects and said they appeared to simply be some flares hanging from helium balloons. Mailo said he has no idea why his neighbor released the balloons, but he regrets not filming the act.

“I feel bad for the people freaking out about this,” Mailo said. “I could’ve put this whole thing to rest.”

Civilian and military aviation organizations said Tuesday they had idea what caused the lights.

An official with the North American Aerospace Defense Command, which monitors the skies for security threats, said Tuesday the organization did not know where the lights came from.

Ian Gregor, a spokesman for the Federal Aviation Administration said that though air traffic controllers at Sky Harbor Airport witnessed the lights, they do not know the cause. Nothing appeared on radar and Gregor said the FAA will not be investigating.

“There’s nothing to look into,” Gregor said.

Several Valley residents reported seeing the lights in the sky on Monday night and Gregor said the FAA received numerous calls. Witnesses said they saw four lights in a square shape that eventually became a triangular shape. The lights were moving to the east and they disappeared one by one.

Phoenix resident Kent Titze and his wife watched the lights from their house near Loop 101 and Cave Creek Road.

“It was something I’ve never seen before,” Titze said. “Right away I thought ‘UFO’.”

Titze’s wife Fran rushed to take pictures of the lights.

“To me it looked like clusters of red lights - like three or five of them in each bundle,” Kent Titze said.

Republic reporters Claudia Koerner and Erin Kozak also contributed to this article.

How great does THIS movie look??

The Chemical Wedding - what IF Crowley came back??

Can’t wait!

April Cool List

Here’s a way to create images for servitors, etc - very cool

Instructions for the “Memory Palace” technique

Ever wanted to (EASILY) make your own comic strip?

How “aware” are you? Take this FAST, simple and Entertaining test.

Really? I mean…. wha?

7 Reasons the 21st Century is Making You Miserable

The Art of Memetics - Pirate Edition Great .pdf download - ever wonder about viral memetics?

Jar Jar will make you SHUDDER with delight - article

This little free game is like crack - my highest lvl is 42

The Marathon is easy. There are no Lions. 6 Maasai warriors in New York

So it’s 4/15 - didja do it?

Didja file yer Taxes?

In honor of it being 4/15, may I present Love & Taxes.

AZ Caves to pressure to alter 9/11 monument

Yeah, the one that was PRIVATELY FUNDED.

Inscriptions to be removed include:

House Bill: HB 2700

• “Must bomb back”

• “05 19 03 Avtar Singh Cheira, a Sikh, shot in Phoenix”

• “Foreign-born Americans afraid”

• “09 15 01 Balbir Singh Sodhi, a Sikh, murdered in Mesa”

• “Middle East violence motivates attacks in US”

• “FBI agent issues July 2001 warning in ‘Phoenix Memo’ ”

• “06 03 02 Congress questions why CIA & FBI didn’t prevent attacks”

• “Fear of foreigners”

• “Feeling of invincibility lost”

• “03 13 02 New Afghan leader elected”

• “You don’t win battles of terrorism with more battles”

• “Violent acts leading US to war 05 07 1915, 12 07 1941, 08 04 1964 & 09 11 2001″

The 9/11 citizens commission that helped design the memorial is already working on its own “alterations”. They include the removal of two inscriptions considered most objectionable - “Erroneous U.S. air strike kills 46 Uruzgan civilians” and “Terrorist organization leader addresses American people” - and the addition of six new phrases.

This memorial has been hailed as a monument of free speech, capturing the many American reactions to the 9/11 tragedy.

I miss good, old fashioned free speech.

LINK for good measure.

Wowzers. Today is a special day on a personal level.

Most of you know I am married to the lovely and talented Necheshyra.

Most of you DON’T know that today is our 3 yr anniversary.

I am not writing this post because of the vanity of the accomplishment, but lately I have been reflecting on the past - where I have come from, where I am going, what has changed along the way.

When I met my wife we were acquaintances who socialized in a common group of people. I had only recently been divorced from my first wife and never considered her to be the subject of my desire. Actually, my only desire at that time was to AVOID relationships and encourage non-committal type female companionship. Yes, I was a man-whore. That worked out well for me. I had lots of fucking, lots of magick, a busy social calender and all the fun (and occasional drama) that went along with that lifestyle.

Even through that, we became closer and closer until we were best friends. She listened to my exploits, counseled and intervened in my liaisons when needed, and generally became my primary support person along with one other friend (who is a Fool). We lived together for years before we were married.

I will skip a lot and FF to us, out of the blue, deciding to date. Within months we were married (3/31/05) at an IOT National meeting. The ceremony was presided over by Fr. Alloy, 1*, (then) Sectionhead and Priest of Chaos.

As a Generation X’er, my life and philosophies have always orbited the concept of impermanence. Most of my generation finds security in chaos rather than order, and I am no different. Marriage, for us, represented a centering and acceptance of that Chaos, not control of it. This is the central concept that leads to our partnership working as well as it does. 3 years feels like 10 years (and in some ways it is), and 3 years feels like yesterday.

I’m not going to paint an idealistic picture here of a rosy and perfect relationship 100% of the time, but what I am saying is that because we have approached this as a partnership based on mutually agreeable philosophies, we have a much more flexible relationship than others in our monkeysphere. In fact, I would have to observe our relationship, our partnership and our friendship are about the most amazing web of entanglement I have ever seen - and it is delicious.

I’m going to give my wife a beautiful compliment right now and you’re all going to have to deal with however it sounds:

You are my equal in every way. In your life you have attained exactly as much as I - but in different areas. This creates a beautiful equilibrium between us. I do not believe I could have chosen someone better suited to sharing this ride with. The fact that you challenge me daily to grow, to become better and to evolve enlivens my spirit. I’m grateful for you. I’m proud to be with you. And of course, I love you. Happy Anniversary. Let’s have many, many more.

VI-Chao